We often think about prenuptial agreements here in Irvine in the wrong way. Committed relationships in California often evolve over time, way before contracts are involved. Having a financial agreement prior to marriage is a valuable process. It forces a couple to evaluate money as it relates to their relationship. A prenup helps couples avoid problems associated with money in their marriage. It causes the couple to ask each other one of the most important questions you can ask prior to a life-long commitment—Am I marrying you for the right reasons?
Are Your Financial Obligations Forcing You Into a Bad Marriage?
So often couples get married for what they think are the right reasons, but when they take the time to contemplate and communicate honestly, the truth surfaces. That isn’t to say that they are expecting their spouse to become their sugar daddy, though. In today’s world of two income households, “marriage for money” means a very different thing than it used to.
Very often couples become committed financially to one another, prior to becoming legally bound to one another, slowly over time. These decisions aren’t made all at once. They often end up buying a home, having children, and accumulating debt together, all prior to the marriage ceremony. Gradually the couple become committed to their relationship, without having gone through a meaningful process to analyze the relationship and consider whether it is going to work long-term.
Premarital Workshops Help Couples Ask the Tough Money Questions in Preparation for a Prenup
One useful way to help couples asses a life-long commitment, giving them a chance to really think about the relationship is through the premarital workshop offered by Colleen McNamee. This workshop provides the couple with tools to contemplate and make crucial decisions that will affect their relationship, both emotionally and financially. Colleen’s years of experience as a family law expert and licensed divorce mediator have given her unique insight regarding marital relationships, the factors that can influence separation, and how they can be avoided.
Seminar on All Marriage Related Topics, From a Family Law Point of View
Colleen’s three-part seminar will enlighten you on many essential and practical topics related to marriage. She discusses proper planning and communicating about all important relationship issues, especially finances.
We all know that money plays a big part in many divorces, often causing contention, which initiates a split. These money problems can then make the actual legal separation challenging and combative.
So it’s imperative that couples come together, discuss these common reasons for divorce, and begin communicating about issues they may be avoiding or don’t even realize they should discuss. Making the effort to talk about your finances, and consider how much of an effect it’s having on the decision to get married is a vital step.
Marriage for Money
Most people would agree that marrying for money is probably not a good reason for life-long cohabitation and family creation. But money always creeps into the equation. It may not cause a couple to decide to initially form a romantic relationship. But it can certainly become a factor that influences the couple to become more bound to each other than they might readily admit.
Many couples become committed gradually over time, often moving in together, then having joint financial obligations, debt, and children together. This can create a high-pressure situation, where you’ve become committed in ways that maybe you didn’t intend. Are you getting married because you think this is a sustainable relationship? Or have the financial stakes just become too high.
Increased Wedding Costs Cause Financial Pressure
The average cost that people expend on their wedding day continues to balloon each year. An entire industry has been built to encourage you to spend more money than you have planned on your important day.
What used to be wedding photos are now complex packages giving you digital and physical copies of the images, with custom books, specialized photo shoots, and a videographer. Renting a room for your wedding has turned into an entire suite of rooms for you and your guests. The day has turned into a weekend. And the caterer has turned into a catering team, with a wedding planner.
This one event is often anticipated to be the most significant day of a person’s entire existence. As a result, these luxuries can get turned into perceived needs. The entire affair can become miss-aligned with your financial objectives.
Are Your Wedding Preparations Causing You to Make a Mistake?
There’s nothing inherently wrong with spending the money that you have on an important celebration of love. But are these escalating costs, and the pressures associated, creating a situation that is coercing you into a relationship that may not be for the best?
Are you really willing to take on the large emotional and financial obligations associated with a marriage contract, simply because you already paid for the invitations?
Are Your Getting Married to Support Your Irvine Caterer?
As you pay for various parts of your wedding it becomes more and more challenging to change that decision. Have you put down deposits on a reception hall, a photographer, or bought a dress? These companies may make it difficult to get your money back. But you’re not getting married to support their businesses.
Regret of Losing a Deposit Vs. Remorse Over Losing Years of Emotional Happiness
So you made a down payment on a wedding location and you can’t get it back? Maybe the financial loss will sting for a while. But you will never regret AVOIDING marrying the wrong person.
The loss of a small deposit of money will hardly be something you regret in the long run. Having a marriage that ends in divorce, on the other hand, can cause years of pain and financial heartache, potentially costing you hundreds of thousands of dollars here in Orange County.
Prenuptial Agreement Helps You Think This Through
We can become jaded in California regarding marriage and divorce, because we see it so often here in the Irvine area. We see prenuptial agreements in the wrong light, as legal protection from money-grubbing exes.
Don’t think about a prenup so much as a way of protecting your income from a divorced spouse, even though it is. No one intends on getting divorced when they get married.
Think about a premarital agreement as an opportunity to think, plan, and communicate with your future spouse. Think of it as a way of helping you make this commitment to one another the right way, and for the right reasons. Create your premarital agreement through mediation, where you both are equal participants in the creation of the agreement!
If the relationship is going to have problems, you’re better off taking the financial hit now through a break-up, rather than later through a divorce. No matter how financially entangled you’ve become, it’s always easier to separate prior to a marriage contract.
So sign up for McNamee Mediations useful seminar today. Take the time to ask the difficult questions, which eventually avoid troubles for you and your family.